- The AtoZ of me – Blogging from AtoZ2023
- A for all that – an evolving list of my post
- A is for All together now…
- B is for Blogging #mondayblogs #atozchallenge
- C is for Cats
- D is for ‘dont call me that’ – aka Donna #Mondayblogs
- C is for C-PTSD
- E is for Edinburgh
- F is for Fun…
- G is for Gods and mythology
A name I don’t relate toI personally believe that our name is one of the things that define us. And while I know the definition of Donna is ‘lady’ in Italian, I’ve never felt particularly ladylike. I am, in fact, the biggest tomboy moving. I’m actually quite proud of that fact, and don’t avoid hobbies just because ‘that’s not for girls’ (it comes up less now, but it was quite common, even in the gaming community until recently). I always have been. From being more interested in computers, and playing RPGs (D&D was bought for me, for the first time, when I was nine). I was a cadet; I loved being online at internet cafes, I love computer games. As I’ve grown older, though I am definitely ‘feminine’, the name Donna has really been associated with some really bad memories and some of the worst times of my life. And most importantly, it doesn’t feel like me.
So, I changed my nameI’ve been Kai since, basically separating from the father of my children. I’m very open about it not being my legal name (yet), but it *is* my preferred name. Funnily enough though, Kai and Donna, though they have some differences, are still quite interestingly linked. A little at least in my mind.
Kai in various languagesKai has various meanings, depending on the language you’re thinking of, and while it’s considered a gender-neutral name, it’s rarer for a girl to be called it than a boy. In my case, it’s short for Kaiberie, but even at Kai, I feel the Hawaiian ‘Sea’, the Mauri ‘Food’, the Welsh ‘Keeper of Keys, or earth’ and even the Japanese ‘shell’. I feel it fits me more than the definition of Donna. But…all, even ‘warrior’ which is apparently from Frisian roots, and a short form of the name Kaimbe, kind of is with me. All of them are nurturing, kind (well, except warrior), fierce, life-sustaining and life-giving. Much like everything that people say about women, and so while I’ve changed my name, I feel I’m still kinda true to it. Just…don’t call me Donna. (and for those of you that ask, you now know why there’s a D at the start of my pen name).
Yesterday’s Blog postsC for CPTSD – Kaiberie.com C is for Cats – Kaiberie.com C is for Characters – BooksbyKai
Yesterday’s commentsMonty’s Blahg The Sound of one hand Typing
Kai is a writer, author and avid reader. A mental health advocate, Ludosport athlete and coder. She’s the mother of two young adults, owned by two cats, and lives with her beloved in the Cotswolds.
That is certainly very interesting. We live our entire lives with the name given to us at birth and so few of us realize that we do have the power to change it.
Kai, if I remember correctly, was the demon god in the Kung Fu Panda series 😉
This post reminded me so much of the worth of self- love and how liberating it is when we focus on ourselves first.
More power to you Kai and may this name shower you with plenty of affirmations and strength.
LOL. It was, yes. It was also the name of an assassin in a TV series, Lexx, and is the name of a dog that is mentioned in passing in Ananzi Boys by Neil Gaiman.
I believe I’m the only Kaiberie there is in the world though. I don’t use that name often though (it’s my online username almost everywhere, unless I wasn’t quick enough to grab it or I’ve lost the password to it) because I’ve… had various ways of that being spelled, so I shorten it to Kai. Also, Kaiberie is a mouthful. 😉
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