The blog of D Kai Wilson-Viola

Author, advocate, designer, mental health advocate and parent. 

Catching up

Catching up

This entry is part 2 of 10 in the series Blogging From AtoZ 2022

A- D for the Blogging AtoZ challenge will be up in the next 24 hours or so, and I’ll be hopping around all of the blogs and hopefully meeting some new, neat people. We’ve got family visiting this weekend though, so, I’m prioritising the visit and a belated Mother’s Day celebration ūüôā

Afternoon cream tea yumminess!


  • A is for Alive, in a sense…
  • B is for Books
  • C is for Covid
  • D is for Dancing in the rain
  • E is for Elden Ring
  • F is for Fantasy
  • G is for Gaming
  • H is for home/hope
  • I is for Indie Authors
  • J is for July
  • K is for Kai and all my other names/Kairos
  • L is for Ludosport
  • M is for Magic/Mental health
  • N is for Never/Night
  • O is for open
  • P is for Psychosis
  • Q is for Quiet
  • R is for Run girl, Run
  • S is for and why I found a way to explain my perspective in sports
  • T is for Time
  • U is for unsustainable
  • V is for Victories, even the small ones
  • W is for White
  • X is for Xray
  • Y is for Years
  • Z is for Zzzzz

I may deviate, slightly, from this, and there may be more than one topic a day, but year’s the general plan. Plus the daily poem, and posts on other blogs ūüėČ

The Blogging A to Z – a is for Allonsy

The Blogging A to Z – a is for Allonsy

So. ¬†I signed up for the ‘Blogging A-Z‘ project, and though I thought that I’d be doing something else by now, I thought I’d go with this idea.

A is for Allonsy.

I think I’m really showing the geek streak for this first one. ¬†Allon-sy is what the 10th Doctor (Dr Who) ¬†said when he ran off to do stuff. ¬†And of all the Doctors, David Tennant was my favorite of the most recent ones.

It’s not the reason a lot of people think of.
Dr Who was something I loved growing up – like many other geeky kids, I have fairly unfocussed, but vivid memories of hiding behind the couch when the Cybermen came on TV, or the Daleks. ¬†So having Dr Who back was great. ¬†And it came back as my life began to change for the better. ¬†By the time the 10th incarnation came onto our screens for the first time, I was deeply into the relationship I’m still in now (it’s our 9th anniversary this month), ¬†I was settled, and I was writing. ¬†By the time the catchphrase ‘Allon-sy’ came up as often as it had, it was 2007, and I’d moved house, and was about to start Uni. ¬†So that specific catchphrase is something I associate with some of the happiest and most settled times of my life.

The fact that it was David Tennant probably helped though. And given the BBC produce one of my absolute favorite programs (Sherlock – I’ll talk about that later), I’m just glad that some of the writers that are now doing the stuff I really love had a hand in the show.

The thing about Dr Who is though, when you think about it, is that you’re getting great storytelling, drama and interest in a sci fi show that has become cult. ¬†And though I disliked one of the writers and felt his shows were weaker when watching, some of the absolute BEST things I’ve seen have come from there. ¬†I loved ‘Blink’ (and am making a little cubee for my desk of the Weeping Angels), I loved all of the library episodes, and I really REALLY enjoyed the first of what I hope will be many Neil Gaiman episodes. ¬†Though, I know that was the 11th Doctor ūüėČ

A is also for…

Alexandria Publishing Group. ¬†That’s the writing and publishing co-operative I’m involved with. ¬†We keep a blog and lots of great content appears on the site – but there’s also some of the most amazing indie books that you’ve maybe never heard of on the site itself – we’ve got some incredible writers, so if you want to, go over and explore !


The Blogging A to Z – a is for Allonsy

Degree confirmation

As many of you know, I’ve spent the last four years doing a degree in Creative writing, with a side of psychology. ¬†It’s been a long road, especially after I fell and banged my head.
But, to the credit of the University of Gloucestershire, and my tutors, we got through it – they were amazingly supportive and helpful and made sure I was in the best position possible to make my degree work for me. ¬†I can’t praise them enough.

But – I’m delighted to confirm that I got a 2:1.

So, now I’m a graduate. ¬†Wooohooo!

The Blogging A to Z – a is for Allonsy

A Day in the Life

Last night, in the ‘writechat’ ( we were talking about a lot of different things – creativity and inspiration (which I’m going to post about tomorrow), productivity and more.

One of the comments I made was that my day runs on a split shift – that I take the kids to school, do around an hour of chores (more or less), have a half out workout on the wii-fit+/ea sports active, and then between 10:30 and 12, Write.¬† I stop for half an hour, then write again till 3.¬† I pick up the kids, and spend time with them and my finacee, and then, at 8:30, when they go to bed, I go up to my office (on the same floor) and then work for another couple of hours three days a week.¬† I either edit, reearch, or write up a novel in 30 days plan.¬† But I thought I’d outline exactly what I do and would love to hear from other people too.

History of my ‘Day in the life’ articles

At some point I’ll go back and find my two other ‘day in the life articles’ and place them in the archives, but I did my first ‘day in the life’ piece because I was asked how I fitted everything in.¬† At the time my daughter was two – and I was with my ex, and I had a very hectic life with two toddlers, an ex who to be honest I disliked and was struggling to keep our relationship together, and was struggling with lots of different things, including starting a business (which collapsed later) with a freind.

My next one, in 2007 was just before my head injury.¬† By that point, I’d met a new partner, I’d moved 400 miles, and I’d JUST started at Uni.¬† It was amazing how it had changed, but then I had a lifechanging accident.¬† I fell and banged my head, and for the next year and a half everything was a struggle.¬† Both my 2007 and 2008 Nanowrimos were almost the only writing I did.¬† Poetry that used to flow and spill from me took days to write, and there was nothing left for me to pull from.¬† I’m not sure, entirely why it happened, but it did, and I went from writing between 6 and 7.5k to writing 3k, if I was lucky.¬† My 2009 Nanowrimo was more successful, but it was still a monumental effort.¬†¬† But with my ‘new’ routine, it’s getting better.¬† Slowly.¬† And as @toniandrews said, “That’s still prolific. 3K is a good day.”¬†
I still feel like a failure though – which is more about me than anyone else.

And without further ado, ‘A Day in the life 2010′, ‘Tuesday’

7:30am РThe kids and I get up, get dressed, have brekfast, get the last of our stuff ready for school etc. 
8:20am –¬† The Kids and I leave for school
9am –¬† Tuesdays is office straightening day – filing paperwork, printing, signing or duplicating contracts, posting stuff back…
10am – Yoga/20 minutes of sports active.
10:30am-3pm РWriting with a quick sandwich stop.  There was no lunch break today.
3pm – left early to go to the library, because one of my requested books was in.
3:20pm – picking up my adorabe pre-teens.
4pm Рhome, snack for the kids, talk about thier day.  We clean up the bottom floor.
5pm – tea and getting the youngest ready for her Brownies.
6pm – youngest leaves for Brownies, eldest and I do popcorn and a movie.
8pm – youngest is back home, tuck her into bed and then at 8:30pm, do the same with my son. (Tuesdays and Wednesdays are the only nights I don’t read to them)
9pm – Tuesdays is games night, unless it’s cancelled, so freinds, gaming, or movies.¬† If games are cancelled, I edit my work or write.
10:30pm – reading, todo list in bed or Fallout 3 (which I’m currently playing through if I get everything else done).
12am – usually asleep.

I’m currently sleeping 6 hours, not four, and teaching myself that this is better for me, but I can operate on three or four hours sleep.

A (reposted) meme

A (reposted) meme

I swiped this mercilessly from¬†Angel at home. Tagged readers and freinds at the end (if you’re not tagged, do it and let me know, I’ll know to tag you next time ;) )

How long have you been blogging?

Uhm. I’ve been blogging since around November 2002 (officially, on Livejournal)) and before that I kept a Ujournal that dated back to around August of 2002. Before THAT, I kept an updated page on what I was up to, and had done since around 1999.

Why did you start blogging?

I liked the idea of building a circle of freinds online, reading thier blogs, and having them read my stuff (LJ for the win!) and then later, I was one of the first proponents of buisiness blogging (boy, wish I’d followed up on that one slightly better) on Ryze, in 2004. I had my own blog network early 2004, and started learning WordPress mid 2004. Haven’t looked back., the predecessor of this blog ran as a personal blog from 2004 to early 2009.

What have you found to be the benefits of blogging?

Show me something that isn’t a benifit. I’ve encountered and gotten to share opinions, my writing in public has improved, I’ve made contacts and met amazing people.

How many times a week do you post an entry?

Most blogs I keep (about a dozen) update once a week. Some have a more regular schedule, some less.

How many different blogs do you read on a regular basis?

I’ve lost count. Got a feed of my faves in my email – then another couple of dozen handfuls in my feed-reader. I guess I read about 150 blogs regularly.

Do you comment on other people’s blogs?

Not really – I comment when I can add something – I’m not always as confident in expressing my views on other people’s blogs, so if I see something I want to talk about, I link back and do it at my own place.

Do you keep track of how many visitors you’ve had?

WordPress lets me track visitors, but it’s not important.

Do you ever regret a post that you wrote?

Yeah, all the time. I get angry, I respond, then I regret. I’ve gotten into a habit of making sure I’ve always got a couple of spare posts in draft on my bigger blogs, so if I’m off on a tear, I can write it, post one of the others, and if it’s still valid the next day, I edit it and then post it.

Do you think your audience has a true sense of who you are based on your blog?

That’s a hard one – my partner says he barely knows bits about me sometimes, and I do keep a lot of what goes on (for various reasons) away from the public eye.

Do you blog under your real name?

Everyone knows me as Kai – so yeah, technically. It’s not my ‘real’ name in the sense that it’s on my birth certificate though. One of the biggies with our family is it’s easy to see who I am, if you’ve got a little technical knowhow, because my information is in public, so my name isn’t a big deal, but I don’t share a last name with my fiancee or kids, so they’re protected.

Are there topics you would never blog about?

I don’t blog about a couple of things, because people get upset. I’ve got a blog for mental health, so sucide isn’t a taboo, but talking about it in personal terms IS because people don’t understand why that’s a part of how I cope. I don’t talk about how difficult my daughter is sometimes in absolute terms because she’s got a disorder, and just as I expect people to respect that my behaviour isn’t always in my control, I accept that of her. It’s hard though, I think some of the stuff we’re going through would be good to put ‘out there’ but I’m still trying to find blameless language for it.

I don’t blog about books in progress, non fiction ones anyway, because I’ve had concepts taken off me before. I talk about my fiction ones, a lot, because the ideas are just too dammed cool.

I don’t talk about my deepest relationships unless I need to vent because it’s not my way – my beloved and I don’t talk about a lot of things in public, but he’s more private than me, and I respect that.

What is the theme/ topic of your blog?

This new one is a mommyblogger blog, because it was needed (wyrdmom), and my LJ is a catchall for my freinds to keep up with me. No topic or theme though, just wierdness ;)

Do you have more than one blog? If so, why?

Uhm. Hell yeah. Don’t have space to list them all either, but they amalgamate at .

As for why? because I can? not a good enough answer?
I keep seperate blogs because I believe firmly in ‘long tail’. If you niche down, you’ll find the group of people you’re looking for, instead of being ‘broadscale’ if that makes sense ;)

Have you ever deleted a comment from your blog?

Yeah – and I don’t approve comments that are attacks on me or my other commenters. I believe in free speech, but I don’t like spam and I don’t see the point of slagging matches. I’ve deleted comments on LJ for much the same reason, or because the person making the comment has asked me to because they made a mistake.