The blog of D Kai Wilson-Viola

Author, advocate, designer, mental health advocate and parent. 

The comments we do approve – and the ones we don’t

The comments we do approve – and the ones we don’t

I got a couple of irate emails this week, demanding to know why I’m not approving certain comments on the blog.

While I read (and usually respond with links and other support where appropriate) everyone’s comments on the blogs, for your protection, and the tone of the site, I rarely approve ‘negative’ comments.

There is a woman that has been commenting, endlessly on our posts that hasn’t been approved is basically saying everything about bipolar disorder that we’re vehemently against – I don’t believe for one minute that we should consider bipolar disorder a burden, though I’m all for wallowing occasionally.  I don’t believe we should ‘battle’ the disease, because we’re anthromposizing something that isn’t human.  We can show our spirit instead by being the best we can be.

Living with bipolar disorder is somewhat like changing your life to help conservation, and lower carbon footprints.  You can do it to your heart’s content, and make a difference internally, by accepting, changing, and adapting, but it’s shouting into the wind until you can get others to understand.  Living with bipolar disorder is more than possible – it’s as big a fact of life as suffering from it.  It really IS all about mindset.  And once you get your head around that – or teach the people you, yourself are living with about it, you can ‘win’, if that’s how you want to see it.

I have a mantra.  Live, thrive, survive.  I live when I’m manic, purely and to the safest, sanest and fullest I can manage (though, being fair, the only reason I manage that is because I have a great partner and several amazing friends), I thrive when I’m ‘normal’ – putting down roots, and growing the important things, and I survive when I’m depressed – I conserve energy, I breathe, and I remember the important stuff.  LTS is my mantra, because it’s how I live.

My book, Pictures In The Dark, talked about it in depth, and we’re about to go into a second reprint, so if you’re interested in no BS, no nonsense discussion on how to adapt to living, thriving and surviving, then please, join us!

Planning 101

Planning 101

Just a quick one today – planning is an issue most freelancers struggle with.  I’ve got a huge issue with planning, simply because I can’t.  I use Achieve Planner most of the time, by Effexis, because it’s a solid program and helps me focus on what I’m actually supposed to be doing.  Well…most of the time.  I’m still not very good at sticking to my weekly calendar as it’s planned out (mainly because I find it a faff to look at the calendar and then switch to the actual tasks outstanding), but I also designed my own basic planner system to use alongside it, specifically for blog deadlines ‘etc’.

It lets you record your guest post commitments, plan effectively, and teaches you a little foreplanning along the way, which is always great.

You can download it, at no charge from here: there are basic instructions in the file with it.  Enjoy!


The comments we do approve – and the ones we don’t

My writing process – introduction

A couple of years ago, I got into a dual discussion, one on my LiveJournal, and one on a mailing list I was with, about ‘how I wrote everything I did’.  A lot of the writers that were in those places weren’t sure I was being entirely honest, entirely fair, or entirely ‘living in the real freaking world’ about my writing.  Those comments have stuck with me in the last few years, as I’ve refined and redesigned my process and gone from prolific to dammed scary in about three months.

I write, on average, 4k a day for clients.  These articles might reduce in number a bit if I’m writing content on a subject I know less about, but in general, I write about that much.  Afternoons and evenings when I write or work, I’m either writing up to another 5k on client stuff, or I’m writing about that again on my own books.  An average week for me sees me adding between 15 and 20k to my own novels, and working on client stuff, or uni stuff, or all three.

It’s taken getting used to several different sets of tools and adapting them to accurately reflect what I need to use them for – or adapting outlines offered in several books that explain how to write drafts in (x) days, but it’s something I believe anyone can do.  So in the next posts, I’m going to explain how I do it, and offer some alternatives for different types of writers (if they exist).


The comments we do approve – and the ones we don’t

When things change

I’ve been on a break from everything – unsurprisingly, in my family, there’s more than one special needs member, and we’ve been spending a lot of time dealing with my daughter.  And then, by the time I discovered I had the time to get on with the stuff that I should, including this blog, I felt demotivated, tired, and a little bewildered.

A year ago yesterday, I banged my head hard enough to cause lasting damage (that they can’t see on an MRI, but has caused problems from memory and sleep disturbances, to decreased creativity, worse depression and beyond).  It’s taken nearly a year to accept that this ‘change’ has caused issues that I can’t simply laugh off, and yesterday was an odd, pensive day.

Things have been changing for me for the last year – I’ve been adjusting to finding it harder to work, or focus on much for periods of time longer than a couple of hours, I’m in my third year at Uni, starting in two weeks time, and I’ve got a lot of thinking to do about how to repair the damage that an errant hacker did around here.  But we’re back, hopefully this time for good.

And to kick off, we’re looking for new writers, to inject fresh voices, either as guest posts, or as regular writers, to the site.  If you’re interested, drop me a line.